Learning how to breathe

Lately I have been so much happier and well balanced even on my Period. I feel so much more at peace with things, even though there is still ALOT going on I just feel at ease. I know that heavenly father will take care of things and some how we will understand his will.
Last Wend. we found out that Breanna was denied command sponsership, which simply means she cant stay for more then 90 days and we dont get paided extra for her to be here and we only gets Tricare standard which mean that the insurance doesnt pay 100% of the bill. So we have a few options and in the next 1-2 weeks we should find out what is going to happen. All I know is that it will all work out!
Excepting myself in the mirror has been very difficult since I was 13 and hormones kicked in. I was always the pudgy big boobed teen, and very low self esteem. I even remember thinking about killing myself when I was 14 to just have to stop thinking I was fat and stupid. Luckily I didnt and moved on and somehow made it to 31! How is it that we think that when we are in our teen years that we feel like life will never move on or be any better. Now looking back I wish I would of just held my head up high and said " screw you I am me and thats ok", but hey now I am me and thats great. Today we went to the base beach at the lake and took pictures of Breanna's first time at the beach, in those pictures I dont great but I love the happiness in my eyes and that even though I still have 50+ pounds to go that Breanna has a mommy that loves her. I could look at the pictures like I have done for so long and said " delete them, I am fat no way is she seeing me like this later in life!" I am glad I can just say Ohh well At least I am in the picture and not the one taking the picture. Memories last till they are forgotten and mothers love a lasts forever.
Check http://breannarose.shutterfly.com/pictures/303 to see what I mean.

Budget

The word BUDGET sometime can mean "0 you are not managing our money right", I want a budget; "or umm where the hell did all our money go". Well in our case its where the hell did our money go! We haven't bounced or gone negative but man it gets close. So tonight I sat down and did a budget its a least a rough draft. What budget forms do you use? What has worked for you guys? So help me out what do you do?